Things a photographer doesn’t want to hear...
"You have a great camera! I bet it takes nice pictures. "
Why yes, I do have a great camera! But it’s not the camera that has studied photography and spent many hours playing around the with lighting, backgrounds, models, and settings. That would be me. All me.
"Just Photoshop that! "
“I’ll just Photoshop that!” I say that jokingly all the time, but it’s annoying when people say that seriously. Photoshop isn’t magic. The whole process of implementing Photoshop into my workflow is a pain. It takes so much time. Then to have a list of demands to make someone taller, skinnier, prettier. It’s just extra work that shouldn’t need to be done when I get it right in the camera in the first place. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve got no problem removing a spot off a photo or something simple like that. But if an endless amount of things are changing, the ethics of the photograph is gone. I’ll write more about my issues with Photoshop another time.
"I'll just print them at Wal-Mart. Just put the pictures on a CD for me. "
Really? If I spend all this time and effort to take photos and make it all look amazing for you, please print them somewhere nicer than Wal-Mart’s photo center. Please. I have a places that print photographs professionally and will happily do it for you or give you references for those places.
“I hate having my photo taken.”
I’m sorry. I suppose I should be more sympathetic with people who don’t want their photos taken. But, if you’re at an event where there’s a photographer, there’s a good chance that your photo is going to be taken. Avoid the camera as much as you want, but don’t go out of your way to tell the photographer you don’t want your photo taken. At events, I personally don’t care who happens to be in my photos since I usually don’t know most of the people there anyways.
“I wanted to invite you to a party (wedding, any other thing). You should bring your camera!”
“Do you mind bringing your camera?” is essentially the codeword from friends who want a professional photographer, but don’t want to pay for one. There are a few families who I’ll do this for, but I happily offer to do so. They don’t have to ask! But for the rest of the world, I do mind bringing my camera. If I’m invited to an event, I might want to be able to relax and enjoy the event. Sometimes I bring my camera with me to events and I don’t use it at all, but I have the freedom to do what I want with it.
Can I have all the reject photos, too?
Nope. They’re rejects for a reason. They’re duplicates of what I’ve already taken or they’re just not good enough. My portfolio is only as good as it’s weakest photo, so by including all the crappy photos, the quality of my work goes down when I give you the rejects. Trust me when I say that the ones I give you are much better!
"Can I borrow your camera for this event (that you won't be at)? "
Uh, no. Would you ask a doctor to borrow their stethoscope for the weekend? I don’t think so. So don’t ask me. I’ll undoubtedly say “no”.
"What's the discount if I edit the pictures you took myself? "
100%. You just won't get any of the photos either. My name is behind my photos, so I’d like to do 100% of it.
"Can you take your watermark off the photos you posted to Facebook? I just want to print them at home."
Really? No!
"Can you make it all black and white except for my eyes? "
That’s tacky.
"When are these going to be on Facebook?"
They’ll get there when they get there. I have another job and many other responsibilities. I’ll put them up when they’re ready! And not all of them will go up.
"Your job is easy! You just click a button all day."
I love photography, so I happily do it, but that doesn’t make it “easy”. As with any skill, it takes practice and training and lots of trial and error.
"Will you take my picture with this camera? "
This one makes me laugh. I’m not good with little point and shoot cameras or those disposable ones. I’m capable of using an expensive SLR one. If you want the photograph to turn out well, let me use my camera. And if it’s at an event, it’s rude to ask the photographer to use some cheap camera when they’re getting paid to shoot the same event.
"You have a great camera! I bet it takes nice pictures. "
Why yes, I do have a great camera! But it’s not the camera that has studied photography and spent many hours playing around the with lighting, backgrounds, models, and settings. That would be me. All me.
"Just Photoshop that! "
“I’ll just Photoshop that!” I say that jokingly all the time, but it’s annoying when people say that seriously. Photoshop isn’t magic. The whole process of implementing Photoshop into my workflow is a pain. It takes so much time. Then to have a list of demands to make someone taller, skinnier, prettier. It’s just extra work that shouldn’t need to be done when I get it right in the camera in the first place. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve got no problem removing a spot off a photo or something simple like that. But if an endless amount of things are changing, the ethics of the photograph is gone. I’ll write more about my issues with Photoshop another time.
"I'll just print them at Wal-Mart. Just put the pictures on a CD for me. "
Really? If I spend all this time and effort to take photos and make it all look amazing for you, please print them somewhere nicer than Wal-Mart’s photo center. Please. I have a places that print photographs professionally and will happily do it for you or give you references for those places.
“I hate having my photo taken.”
I’m sorry. I suppose I should be more sympathetic with people who don’t want their photos taken. But, if you’re at an event where there’s a photographer, there’s a good chance that your photo is going to be taken. Avoid the camera as much as you want, but don’t go out of your way to tell the photographer you don’t want your photo taken. At events, I personally don’t care who happens to be in my photos since I usually don’t know most of the people there anyways.
“I wanted to invite you to a party (wedding, any other thing). You should bring your camera!”
“Do you mind bringing your camera?” is essentially the codeword from friends who want a professional photographer, but don’t want to pay for one. There are a few families who I’ll do this for, but I happily offer to do so. They don’t have to ask! But for the rest of the world, I do mind bringing my camera. If I’m invited to an event, I might want to be able to relax and enjoy the event. Sometimes I bring my camera with me to events and I don’t use it at all, but I have the freedom to do what I want with it.
Can I have all the reject photos, too?
Nope. They’re rejects for a reason. They’re duplicates of what I’ve already taken or they’re just not good enough. My portfolio is only as good as it’s weakest photo, so by including all the crappy photos, the quality of my work goes down when I give you the rejects. Trust me when I say that the ones I give you are much better!
"Can I borrow your camera for this event (that you won't be at)? "
Uh, no. Would you ask a doctor to borrow their stethoscope for the weekend? I don’t think so. So don’t ask me. I’ll undoubtedly say “no”.
"What's the discount if I edit the pictures you took myself? "
100%. You just won't get any of the photos either. My name is behind my photos, so I’d like to do 100% of it.
"Can you take your watermark off the photos you posted to Facebook? I just want to print them at home."
Really? No!
"Can you make it all black and white except for my eyes? "
That’s tacky.
"When are these going to be on Facebook?"
They’ll get there when they get there. I have another job and many other responsibilities. I’ll put them up when they’re ready! And not all of them will go up.
"Your job is easy! You just click a button all day."
I love photography, so I happily do it, but that doesn’t make it “easy”. As with any skill, it takes practice and training and lots of trial and error.
"Will you take my picture with this camera? "
This one makes me laugh. I’m not good with little point and shoot cameras or those disposable ones. I’m capable of using an expensive SLR one. If you want the photograph to turn out well, let me use my camera. And if it’s at an event, it’s rude to ask the photographer to use some cheap camera when they’re getting paid to shoot the same event.
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