Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Farewell Whatever You Were

Spring break is over, but I don’t remember it starting. Home was a whirlwind of excitement with places to go, people to see, worship team practices to go to, and children to babysit. It quickly turned into a cacophony of police reports, tearfully phone calls, and funeral arrangements. Then somehow the end was in sight and the final sprint was full of packing, homework, and goodbyes. And now I’m back in Chicago encircled by skyscrapers, incessant noise, and the familiar responsibilities of a busy college student. It’s all just a semivisible blur.

Something has to change. I refuse to run through the rest of this semester without a second thought. I’ve been taught so much in the past few months and I want to actually use what I’m learning.
It looks great in a textbook, but being able to process and apply the lessons I’ve learned is what I aspire for.

Grades are important, I won’t argue that, but so are relationships with both God and people. God needs to be my priority…I don’t know how I forget that sometimes.
I’m so good at eliminating Him from my life, though I should be surrendering the pen to Him as He needs to be the one writing it.

I live on Smith 5 with 38 girls and have a wonderful brother floor. Lots of friends are home in California, as well. There’s also my family. I love connecting with people and getting into their lives to learn from them, but also to encourage them. My desire is to befriend more lost people, seeing as the majority of my friends are from Moody and my home church. I spend time in the Juvenile Detention Center and in Cabrini Green each week for my PCM and with the Big Brother Big Sister program.
It’s the perfect opportunity to be a light in a dark place.

I also want to learn a few new guitar chords and take more pictures. Just because I can.

I don’t want to look back on the next few months with the same disappointment that I did when looking back on the past few. I want to know that I’ve lived my life for something more.

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